The Learning Space Blog

The Learning Space Blog

The Key to Loving in a Different Way

So what does it mean to "hold space" for someone else?  “It means that we are willing to walk alongside another person in whatever journey they’re on without judging them, making them feel inadequate, trying to fix them, or trying to impact the outcome. When we hold space for other people, we open our hearts, offer unconditional support, and let go of judgment and control” It sounds ...   Read More

What Does It Take To Observe Self In Your Own Family

Do you find yourself wondering what makes you avoid family relationships? Do you wonder, what is going on, why is so and so upset or picking fight or will not return phone calls, etc.?  What are people trying to tell you?  What must you do to figure out relationship issues? How can I see who is influencing me and how am I influencing them?  How do any of us become more self-defined? ...   Read More

Filed under Bowen family systems theory

Training Animals is Simple but My Family is Falling Apart

 How is it that families fall apart but dogs can be well trained?  What does the founder of 'clicker' training, an observation- based approach to shaping animal behavior using positivie reinformcement, have to say about human relationships?  Read more.     Read More

Filed under Family

The Wei of Triangles

Would it be useful to see how dominance behavior emerges in a triangle?  It is easy to see the two person social system, as above, and far more challenging to see the family as a unit where the two against one triangle emerges. Can it be that triangles are an automatic “whatchamacallit” scapegoating thing?  Read more.   Read More

Bullies, Worries – Mindsets and the Family Projection Process

Can understanding how family projection works in society and in the mental health field give us any advantage? Remember, this knowledge has been around for almost sixty years now and doesn’t seem to have been influential on the societal level. In family systems theory, each individual in the system has a mind set which in some way can inhibit or reinforce the bully’s mindset and behavior. In a ...   Read More

Navigating in Social Systems: The use of social interactions around illness and death

Adaptation and other Relationships Shifts The death or the illness of a family member are the most obvious times when families are required to change and adapt to the coming and going of its members. How the ongoing social group interacts during these periods can be subtle or dramatic. Some families pull together and can function at high levels while others fall into chaos. What is the difference ...   Read More

Societal Reaction to the Killing of Nine People in Charleston SC: Are We Blindsided by the Emotional System?

These ideas were generated by the first summer session for Navigating Systems and Murray Bowen’s Concept of Societal Regression. Each day we are bombarded by the difficulties we as a society face: random violence, wars, mass migrations, acts of terrorism, senseless murders, posturing politicians, our decreasing attention span, increases in autism, breakdowns in relationships and many other ...   Read More

Filed under Bowen family systems theory

If You Open Your Mind CanYou Open the Door?

A tragedy of ignorance unfolds as more evidence comes to light about the relationship between a vulnerable person and society. How much do we know about how a seemingly relatively well functioning person can become psychotic / suicidal and crash a plane into the French Alps killing150 people? How much do we see him in isolation? What are the chances that when the pilot yelled “OPEN THE DOOR!” this ...   Read More

Filed under Bowen family systems theory

Social Pressure and Differentiation of Self

How hard is it to be who you want to be? How much do you conform to what others need or want you to be? How challenging is it to see and act when relationship pressures are intense to go along or to avoid issues? The effort to define one’s self to important others is usually a tension filled danger zone. Our near and dear can act as part of a system and resist self-definition by anyone. We are often ...   Read More

The Illusion of When the Relationship Dance Becomes War

Young lady or old woman?

What if the anger we felt toward another was all just an illusion? Maybe we are never really mad atimages-3 someone else, but instead, at ourselves for the way we are reacting to them. It’s a little mind bending when you are looking at a picture and you think you know what you are seeing only to feel your eyes and brain shift to seeing something completely different. I had my own ah-ha moment a few ...   Read More

About the Learning Space

"The Learning Space is a creative, energetic thinking space for individuals striving to live optimally in all their most important relationships. The Learning Space provides a conceptual space—a place to consider and experience alternate ways of relating."
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Theory & Emergence of Self

Theory & Emergence of Self

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